West Ed

Yesterday evening, I was discussing with Winston and Lauren, my hosts. Interesting discussion, all about environment and tar sands. But at some point, they gave me a tip. For one day, I should forget about nature, ecology, pictures, etc. As I am in Edmonton for a week, I should have a truly urban experience. A lot of irony and mystery below that. But I trusted them.

This morning, I took bus #1 to West Ed Mall (Ed standing for Edmonton). According to the very serious Eastern Connecticut State University, West Ed Mall was the world's largest from its construction in 1981 until 2004. Since then, it was dethroned by some Asian little brothers. Anyway, it still remains the largest in the entire American continent. From far, before having read this academic study, I understood. Arrived at the end of line 1, I faced a huge cube of concrete, just covered by little orange bricks to make it look more cosy. Nothing to do; I was already freaked out.

As large as Vatican City, and with a plan looking like a church, welcome to the Mecca of consumption! Everywhere, on your left, on your right, on the floor above, only shops. To meet you compulsive disposition of buying stuff, more than 800 shops: from lingerie to suitcases, from video games to electrical domestic appliances, not to mention furniture shops and travel agencies. You can even groom your pet or go to the dentist.

That's not all! If Madame (or Monsieur!) takes too much time, you could spend as much money as him/her in casino or go to the cinema or the pool with huge slides. You can bring the kids to merry-go-round, or mini-golf, or even visit a pirates' boat. And just let your teens enjoy the roller coaster (or loop-the-loops, whatever it's called in English!).

If you think you haven't done or spent enough yet, make a sportive break and go to the ice ring. To keep you on form, there is also a shooting range and a sort of urban tree-climbing with girders and ropes. And if you like nature, you can feed the sea lions twice a day during their performance.

Of course a shopping day really gives you an appetite. So, when it's time to eat, do not waste your time in picking a place. Just go to those dining halls where 200 people can easily fit, surrounded by at least 30 fast foods (burgers, thai, pizza, indian, etc.) at your disposal.

And, oh! sh..., it is already the end of the day and you only did half of what you planned! No worries. Just book a room in the hotel and finish the work tomorrow or the day after. Some do that. As for me, only one hour was enough to be disgusted. Even if I only spent $3 for the bus, I wish I had some of those airsickness bags with me. To try to wake up from this nightmare, let's go to the Art Gallery of Alberta!